Reconnecting.

Have you ever had a time where you just paused to truly examine your life? Those are intimidating moments where you're forced to honestly analyze where your time and energy is going. You're either going to be pleased or disappointed with what you find in those moments. 

I've had a few of those moments, and I was disappointed to find that I was disappointed. I love teaching with all my heart, but I never expected it to consume me. Somewhere along the line I lost a lot of "me" for the sake of my profession. I don't regret giving my time and energy to help my kiddos flourish; I regret that I lost track of who I was outside of a teacher. I actually began questioning what it was I enjoyed outside of teaching because it seemed like the only other things I did beyond schoolwork were sleep and eat. It was a real wake up call when I realized how it impacted me to the point where I was sacrificing my own well-being for the sake of my career. 

God has placed so many blessings in my life. While those include being able to do what I love each day for a job, I know that using my gifts and talents to honor God go beyond my classroom. I know I'm meant to use them to be a good wife, daughter, granddaughter, friend, dog momma, and neighbor. I know I'm meant to have some hobbies that I spent time doing to rest and recharge so I can fulfill my callings to be all of these things to others. 

So what do you do when you've lost track of who you are and what you enjoy? You pause, pray, and make some changes. 

I recently heard a blurb on K-Love about how we can invest so much time in what we think is important that we forget to invest in what's really important. The speaker continued on to say that sometimes we have to do okay instead of great on things and let some things go to make time for things that matter, like time with family. 

I've been trying to put that into practice, and it's made it less stressful to decide to simply make note of an idea for next time I teach that lesson rather than trying to make magic happen the night before I want something. I don't have to act on every idea right now to improve lessons. I can wait to grade until the next day if I really need some extra time playing with the dogs to de-stress. I can go to bed early and leave some things unfinished. I can talk on the phone with my family instead of sweeping all the floors on a weeknight -- the fur will still be there come the weekend. 

I've had some time off for Easter break, and I have literally spent most of it crocheting and watercolor painting. I've also done my share of watching Netflix, listening to music, letter writing, and watching the Crane Cam to see the sandhill cranes. I've also gotten to help my hubby with our basement project. That's not to say that I won't tackle school stuff before we go back on Tuesday, but I don't regret investing time to reconnect with things I enjoy. I am taking time to be me, and it feels good. It's been too long.