A Brief Resurfacing

Wow, I knew it'd been a while, but a week?

My goodness.

Life's been happening fast and full, and it continues to come at me that way.

Seems like The Challenge ended at just the right time.

I'll write when I can.

I'm missing it.

A lot.

To Be or Not to Be...Weirded Out?

It was always kind of depressing in college to come downstairs to find my clothes on top of the dryer. There's just something cruel about taking away somebody's joy in that fresh-from-the-dryer warmth (especially in winter). But time's too precious to waste on waiting for an open dryer when clearly the cycle's done, so I'd get over it.

I have typically been pretty prompt to take my laundry out of the dryer. Sometimes, believe it or not, I was even early. [I know, I know, I didn't know I was capable of being early to something, either, but it's been known to happen. A plan's in the works to expand that beyond my laundry.]

I was about 15 minutes late getting to the dryer yesterday. Nobody has clothes in the wash when I'd transferred mine to the dryer, so imagine my surprise to find my clothes on top of the dryer yesterday.

Folded.

Well, hey, thanks!

But wait, I'm sorry, did you even fold my underwear?

Okay, take that "thanks" and turn it into a question. Suddenly that made it a little strange. Personally I would have tucked the underwear between other clothing so it wasn't out in the open.

And I probably wouldn't have been thoughtful enough to fold somebody else's clothes, to be honest. Not that I would have taken their clothes out, anyway...

Now I'm not going to be able to help but pass by people in the building and wonder, Are you the laundry folder?

I'm just glad I didn't run into the person in the laundry room. I'd find it a little strange to have my face matched with underwear before a name, but that's just me.

~"Goodness in other people and what they contribute inspire me. I love i when someone is gifted and shares it in some way so that is has a trickle-down effect." [-Renee Zellweger]~

An Old Standby

There's just so much that I love about this song: it's mellowness, the lyrics, the sentiment it captures.

Another case of beautiful music and beautiful lyrics combined.

Because sometimes it's fantastic to get lost in a song and not have to do any thinking at all.

All the Single Ladies...and Men, Too

Dear single friends, this sermon series is a lot of food for thought. It's called "The New Rules for Love, Sex, and Dating" and it's phenomenal. I strongly recommend it...especially number 1 and 4.

[I'm not saying you can't watch it if you're married or engaged, but it's definitely geared toward us singletons.]

I watched 1-3 earlier this summer, but I just got around to number 4 today. Have you ever had those times where you have been praying about something you're confused about, and then out of nowhere you find the answers you need? Yeah. Definitely happened with this one.

Anyway, if you have the time, watch 'em. You'll be left with lots of things to mull over. And if you want to talk about any of it, hey, let me know! :)

Rearranged Day

How today was supposed to go:

Get up at 7:30 for breakfast and coffee, complete with lingering over the latter

Get ready for the day, including putting laundry away

Spend a few hours at school, planning and cleaning in the classroom

Take a le nap

Eat lunch

Have friends over for a movie

Finish up some school things

Relax

Sleep

How today actually went:

Get up at 7:30 to turn off alarm and feel migraine

Go back to bed until 9ish to wake up with room still spinning

Linger over coffee, praying for head to get better

Get ready and decide not to go to school

Eat lunch

Talk to aunt on the phone

Have friends and neighbor over for a movie

Walgreens run

Talk to friend for a few hours

Blog

Watch a TV show

Go to bed

...yup, still good.

Quote of the Week

Setting: A kindergarten classroom in small town Nebraska.

Time: 8:30ish. Playtime.

[Children are playing in various places around the room. Blocks, dolls, paper and markers, and connect-y shape pieces are just some of the activities. Laughter and talking abound.]

Teacher: What are you making?

Student: Keys for my car. Drive it like you stole it, baby!!!

I can't make these things up, people.

The End...But Not Really.

The 365th day of The Challenge has arrived. And I lived to tell the tale.

The total posts for the year ended up being 288 (including today's). That's far less than I thought it'd end up being, but that's okay. Within the words of this blogged year lie a plethora of quotes, memories big and small, emotions, thought processes, and realizations.

So much of what has molded me in the past 12 months is tucked into The Challenge. I'm so glad it coincided with one of the most epic years of my life. It was fascinating to skim back through and let the magnitude of everything wash over me.

This blog has helped me slow down to see truths, blessings, potential, and hope. It's pushed me to own up to my emotions -- raw, messy ones included. It's forced me to be more open and honest, particularly with myself. It's let me know that hey,

I mess up. get silly. get easily excited. love music and quotes maybe a little too much sometimes.

But I also get real.

grow. change. challenge. accept. learn. believe.

And I write.

The challenge may be over, but it doesn't stop now.

My current inspiration:

"If you do not breathe through writing, if you do not cry out in writing, or sing in writing, then don't write, because our culture has no use for it." [-Anais Nin]‎

Watch. Marvel. Repeat.

So I've only watched this video about a million times already...

New favorite? I think so.

Also, this is why I love Glee. Just sayin'.

Also also, I've got zero energy for a post, guys, so this will have to do.

Friend Places

I'd apologize for this being a long post, but I can't. These are words I've been searching for, and now I need to overflow with them. Don't feel obliged to read the whole thing if you're not into long posts. :)

I've grown accustomed to thinking about important places almost like friends. Before you think I'm crazy, hear me out. I bet you'll be thinking of your own Friend Places soon, too.

A Friend Place is somewhere with memories that always welcomes you back to sit awhile. It's comfortable and knows no rushing. It brings warmth to your heart and a smile to your face just being there. It's a place that lets you linger in stories for as long as you want and need. [Remember my creek? That's one of them for me.]

Friend Places become such a part of our story that it's almost unthinkable that they someday may have to leave our story and become nothing more than a memory themselves. Sometimes that's just where life goes, though, and it's heart-wrenching to have to say goodbye.

A house that's held many family memories is about to leave my life for good, and I've been stuck wondering why a house has been able to effectively cause me to cry to the point of being thirsty. I'm serious. I mean, it's just a house, right?

Wrong.

This house has served as being a direct link to my grandparents. It saw my grandparents' love at its strongest points -- that true, deep, and devoted love I aspire to find and pray so much that my cousins will remember to look for, too.

The love that led to the small things

a cereal bowl, spoon, and Frosted Flakes laid out every night, waking calls of "Daaaavid and "Beeeeverly" after a nap, mornings spent with each other, coffee, and stamps, post-it reminders near the medicines in the cabinet

and sustained through the monumental

a hit that made him realize something was wrong, a recovery after a miraculous survival, a husband caring for his ailing wife amidst his own illness

and touched us all along the way

countless Saturday lunches and Sunday dinners made by Grandma's hands, Saturday grocery shopping trips with Grandma, baby wipe containers full of stamps and each grandchild's own stamping binder, finding excuses for us to run to Van's, letting the baseball and football games consume the front yard

The walls saw their whole story unfold into the fairy tale ending we all marvel at.

Losing this house is not losing the memories, but it is losing one of the great symbols of these two remarkable people.

They say that love is what makes a house a home, and there are fewer places that are more "home" than this.

I hope whomever crosses the threshold will feel the stories embedded in there, that their heart will whisper, "This house knows love." And I pray this house will know love and memories so treasured again someday.

...because the thought of such a place staying empty and abandoned breaks my heart more than losing this old friend.

~"It takes hands to build a house, but only hearts can build a home." [-Unknown]~

Technology These Days

Okay...is this cool or creepy? You decide.

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/6RCIlg/didyouknowarchive.com/?p=284

In Attempts to Get This Unstuck...

This song's stuck in my head, so I thought I'd share...and maybe get it out of my head a little.

I'm also not gonna lie: I'm enjoying watching a movie, making letters, texting, and just not really thinking a ton tonight. A good way to start a 3 day weekend. :)

Because "Days Like This" Sometimes Sums Up a Week

There are words building inside me that are nearly ready to overflow. It's been one of those weeks of lessons

welcomed ones

hard ones

unexpected ones

beautiful ones

heart-aching ones

and heartwarming ones

that speeds by too quickly for any real contemplation to take place.

I'm looking forward to my Friday slow down to sit and take in what all of this means, to find the words to frame the lessons contained in this week.

This song has carried me through this week -- especially yesterday:

Faith Like...Penguins?

I love books that I can revisit multiple times and be given something different to ponder each time. I'm not talking about the kind of thinking where you deeply consider something for two seconds before moving on. No, I'm talking about the kind of thinking that stretches over days, maybe even weeks.

Remember a long time ago when I was sharing thoughts from The Shack? Yeah, that's one of those kinds of books. Blue Like Jazz is another. [It's by Donald Miller, in case you want to pick it up. Which you should. Just sayin'.]

Here's what's been ruminating in my head this go-round:

"You'd go crazy trying to explain penguins. It's best just to watch them and be entertained. I don't think you can explain how Christian faith works either. It is a mystery. And I love this about Christian spirituality. It cannot be explained, and yet it is beautiful and true. It is something you feel, and it comes from the soul."

I sense there's another post to come from that at some point, but for now I'm still thinking. :)

[My] Taste of Home

making dinner

sipping wine

baking cookies

folding laundry

with the Bears game on

touched by some sounds and smells of home

in the midst of what has become my own

[that's still sinking in]

happiness at the end of the day.

~"Home is a place not only of strong affections, but of entire unreserve; it is life's undress rehearsal, its backroom, its dressing room." [-Harriet Beecher Stowe]~

What Are The Odds...

...that I could ever talk my dad into doing this at my wedding someday?

Any requests for our mash-up, Dad? ;)

Simple Things That Make My Heart Glad

beautiful sunrises

finding new places to spend time at

following suggestions to great coffee

conversations that make hours seem like minutes

hearing my nephew bellow "Shell!" and "I need buttons!" and "Uh-MAZE-ing!"

getting to watch my nephew play from a few states away

phone calls from my Papa

snippets of good books

good music

comfy sweatshirts

laughter

love

♥

~"All you need is love." [The Beatles]~

"In the Trenches"

So way back (ha! feels that way, at least!) in the years of undergrad, I had a prof that referred to teaching as being "in the trenches." And it was kinda funny...you know, the first time he mentioned it. But he just kept on referring to it that way for the remaining 2 years of school, and it kind of lost its charm.

But then a strange thing happened. Other Ed profs were using the same metaphor.

There begin to be a buzz amongst us Ed majors. "Could there be some sort of hidden message here?" "Is it really as tough as they're making it out to be?" "Don't they know any other analogies?"

I'm not gonna lie: it made us a little uneasy, but we shrugged it off.

But you know what? I'm starting to learn that they may have been on to something after all.

That whole "teacher bladder" thing? Not a joke. Some days we're lucky if we can dash down to the bathroom even during recess. That makes for some really impressive holding abilities, my friends -- much to the dismay of anyone who has to passenger while I'm driving on road trips.

And I used to dream about how much more sleep I'd get once I was out of college and in the "real world" with a regular sleep schedule. Now I just laugh because, yup, those are still just dreams. Day dreams at that. I still don't get nearly enough sleep as I should. I will admit, though, that I do get more sleep than I used to thanks to my 21 kiddos.

I gave up acting in college. I thought I was no good at it. The funny thing is that it's what a bulk of my day consists of now. I get to do voices when I read books, pretend I'm not irritated but rather have ALL the patience in the world, and always portray that all is right in the world. And yes, sometimes I have to try to convince my kids that the "have to" things aren't boring at all.

Perhaps the biggest thing I've learned is that the war really is with your own body. There's the bathroom thing I mentioned earlier, yes, but it goes beyond that. Days when your head hurts, you pop some meds and pretend it doesn't. When you're tired and want to stay in bed, you get up, drink some extra cups of coffee, and get to it. And when you feel like you just might throw up, guess what? If you haven't thrown up, you get up and go to work anyway. This isn't one of those jobs where you just call in "just because" -- no, you go even when you physically don't feel like it. You convince yourself you're okay, and convince yourself to just make it one more hour until lunch, two more until the end of the day, one more until the lesson plans are done...

I'm not saying this to make it sound like one of those "we are teachers, we are unsung heroes" rants. No, there's a time and a place for that. I'm revealing this because this is something that really clicked with me today, and I want to be able to read back through my blog when this whole first year is over and see that I've realized what a huge undertaking this can be sometimes. Because yes, sometimes it really does feel like I am "in the trenches."

Those professors were on to something.

~"A good teacher is like a candle -- it consumes itself to light the way for others." [-Mustafa Kemal Ataturk]~

For You

For my friends with full hearts right now

whether it's overflowing with

hope

disbelief and sadness

patience

memories of those lost

joy

or any other emotion

whatever it is that you're feeling

this is for you.

love and prayers. ♥

Story Songs

The best songs are really the ones that tell a story. It's an added bonus when the music is just gorgeous as well.

Yup, Amos Lee's got it.

A Near(ly)-Miss(ed) Post

My body's wrapped in exhaustion, the kind that comes from

late nights

where conversations and productivity carry me

until shamefully late hours

that will be cursed in the morning.

The kind that tries to keep me

away from the "have to" things tucked into the day.

And then there's the bursts of energy

literal and creative

that carry me through the waking hours

which demand my awareness

my movement

my all.

And at the end of the day

I look at my classroom with a smile on my face

because even on the more trying days,

it's the little things in every day that give it a story

that give me a story.

~"Then there's the joy of getting your desk clean, and knowing that all your lettesr are answered, and you can see the wood on it again." [-Lady Bird Johnson]~