Mark my words. Mark 11:27-33, to be exact.

Somehow my appreciation for my brother's music increases at 2 a.m., but I think that's just because my appreciation for any stimuli while I'm working on papers goes up at this hour, too.

I'm in midst of a 25 page paper. It's due on Friday. It's dominating my life right now. It's a mild obsession, really...sometimes amongst the research/writing journey it's genuine motivation that drives me, other times it's the grade. It's an exegetical on Mark 11:25-33. It's actually pretty fascinating, but it's definitely a bunch of work. There are 16 steps to cover, and a 25 page limit. I'm afraid to say that I may have to condense information because I may have too much, but we'll see. 11 down, 14 to go...

Wow, I can tell I've been exegetical-ing too much this weekend because I had the sudden urge to hit ctrl+s to save after writing that! Habitual now, I'm afraid...wasn't about to lose any pages due to some silly error or random computer shut down (gotta love the quirks of your technological objects!) or something.

So for the quote, how 'bout my exegetical text? Yeah! Enjoy!

MARK 11:27-33 TEXT (NIV)

²⁷They arrived again in Jerusalem, and while Jesus was walking in the temple courts, the chief priests, the teachers of the law and the elders came to him. ²⁸“By what authority are you doing these things?” they asked. “And who gave you authority to do this?” ²⁹Jesus replied, “I will ask you one question. Answer me, and I will tell you by what authority I am doing these things. ³⁰John’s baptism – was it from heaven, or from men? Tell me!” ³¹They discussed it among themselves and said, “If we say, ‘From heaven,’ he will ask, ‘Then why didn’t you believe him?’ ³²But if we say, ‘From men,…” (They feared the people, for everyone held that John really was a prophet.) ³³So they answered Jesus, “We don’t know.” Jesus said, “Neither will I tell you by what authority I am doing these things.”

I didn't know my heart was this capable of missing someone so much.

4 years.

"There's no crying in baseball!" It's a good thing I don't play because I couldn't stop the tears completely today.

"It's a myth that people experience grief for a certain amount of time and then they're over it. Our culture assumes grief should be over in a year, so people may think they're going crazy if they cant 'wrap it up' by then." (- Sandy, the grief support group counselor in the book Good Grief by Lolly Winston...)

I sometimes pretend to be tougher than I am when the truth is that 4 years just makes you better at forgetting how much you miss them.

Losing touch and touching lives.

Sooo here's a random thought I've been pondering for a while: It seems that one of the main reasons people lose touch with people they really care about is because of good intentions. Think about it. How many times have you put off calling somebody you haven't talked to in a while because you wanted a large block of time to catch up on everything? Well, we're at the point where that huge block of time either never comes or quickly gets filled with other things. Oh, Robert Burns knew what he was talking about ("The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry."). Wouldn't it be better just to make a quick phone call here and there so they know you're thinking of them? Perhaps a little card or something? It's hard to find time for any of that sometimes, too, but it's a lot easier than waiting for a block of time.

On an unrelated note, I start teaching in about 2 weeks. One of my classes requires a lab where we team teach a unit in science or social studies. I'm really looking forward to it (in between the times my brain is running through all of the worst case scenarios of this blowing up in my face and my stomach is in knots!) because my partner seems pretty cool and easy-going, and we're in a first grade room doing a social studies unit on natural resources. Our cooperating teacher is going to be a huge help -- she offered to help us find books to use and provide some materials, etc. I've been learning a lot of cool things to use in a classroom in terms of activities, management tips, and the like, so it'll be great to get to try them out! It is kind of overwhelming having no idea where to start with lesson planning and such, but that's what this is all about. It's essentially a low dosage of what student teaching will be like. (Oh, student teaching...such a terrifying phrase...this time in 2 years I will be in some random place in the country...I don't even know where...probably all alone...yikes!!!)

Oy, this time next week I'll be home. =o)

Happy weekending!

~"There's always some reason to feel not good enough, and it's hard at the end of the day. I need some distraction, oh, a beautiful release...maybe you'll find some peace tonight in the arms of the angel. " ["Angel" - Sarah McLachlin...my favorite song of hers, and definitely in my top 5 favorite songs of all time]~

Beautiful love.

I was doing a bit of poking around online earlier (it is, after all, that time of the school year when motivation is hard to come by), and I came across a quote that I just had to write down right away.

"The key to being beautiful is always to be looking at someone who loves you, really." [-Julia Roberts]

Whether you are looking toward a family member, a close friend, a significant other, or our absolutely amazing and glorious God, realize that there is always somebody loving you. Take that love and relish it, reflect it. Don't be afraid to let yourself be loved, even if you don't feel like you deserve that love. One of the most beautiful parts of love is how freely it can be given to anyone. It is a choice. It is a gift. It is a blessing.

Hitting the Breaks.

No, that's not a typo in the title for anyone itching to point it out to me with my grammarian tendencies. It's simply a play on words; puns are becoming increasingly more common coming from me lately due to some influence from a certain someone...*smiles*

Anyways, I never thought I'd make it through that semester. It was the best semester of college by far for many, many reasons, but it was also very trying and stressful. It sometimes was overwhelming, but thankfully there were people to help me until I found my way again. I am walking out of this semester feeling stronger than I have in a while. What's more is that I feel like a whole person again because I'm truly content with where I am at this point.

It's been really nice to sit back and relax during break, and to have a great Christmas. I've really been enjoying having a full 5 days without any work and without any homework...I've been free to stay up ridiculously late and sleep until noon, stay in pajamas all day, and watch a ridiculous amount of Gilmore Girls with Mom. It helps that there has been ridiculous fog over the past two days; it kind of deters you from going out more than what's truly necessary when you can't even see the end of your driveway. I've also gotten to see Valkyrie and Yes Man...I'd recommend waiting to rent the first, but I strongly suggest seeing the second...especially if you have a wonderful twin to go with, haha! I've also read the first two books in the Twilight series, and although they were decent, my life would still be complete if I didn't get to read the remainder of the series.

At the beginning of this break I realized just how worn out I was after this semester. My goal for next semester is still to have as much fun as possible and kick total butt in terms of classes, but I also need to work on taking care of myself better. Someday I'll master that...

~"Shoot for the moon, for even if you miss you'll land amongst the stars." [Les Brown]~

Random, I know...

Doesn't it scare you sometimes the extreme potential the mind -- particularly the writer's mind -- has to come up with in terms of warped ideas?