Just a Friday Morning Drive

The Friday commute starts out hustled -- late again. I decide it's still a victory, though, since I'm only 5 minutes behind the time I'd planned to leave...and yes, I would be on time for the staff meeting. I just will have to find another time for what I'd planned to work on beforehand. 

I'm reminded already to give my plans to the Lord. Let His plan be at work. 

I sing along to MercyMe's Welcome the the New, the soundtrack of my year so far. The words of God's grace and immeasurable love combine with the honesty of how we feel like we aren't strong enough, good enough, capable enough -- it serenades my heart and mind with the Truth. 

The sun is coming up, and I think back to the dark drives just a month ago at this same time, and I'm grateful because the rays lighten my heart and mind. The way the blue sky begins appearing with strokes of purples, pinks, and a streak of orange clouds fills me with joy. You painted a masterpiece this morning, God. I know the colors will morph into a different-looking masterpiece every few minutes until the sunrise melts away and the day truly begins -- many masterpieces it will be. Oh, how awesome to have such a loving Creator who spoils us with beautiful things to look at. 

Yes, I'm tired from getting into bed way too late and being woken up way before my alarm and the kind of tired that comes from a week demanding my time, energy, and especially my emotions. I'm looking forward to the weekend and the extra day off on Monday, and I'm hoping not to bomb the day by focusing on the tired. No, I want to give my kiddos joy and curiosity and knowledge today. I think through my plans for the day and marvel at how much we need to fit into our day -- with a Valentine's party to boot. And there are copies to be made, Friday Folders to fill, lesson plans to fill in for next week...the list seemingly doubles as I think.

I'm about to exit the interstate when I notice waves in the sky. The birds' bodies are a black outline to waves criss-crossing and flowing up and down in the rich blue sky. So many birds, so much moving, and yet the group moves fluidly together. And the waves move forward in the sky as their journey continues -- to food? to a spring home? I'm not sure -- onward. 

I think of Matthew 28:26-27:

Look at the birds of the air: they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

I want to remember this, share this, and cherish this sight longer. I exit the interstate towards school, excited nobody exits behind me. I take advantage of my time at the stop sign to take a quick picture of the amazing sight, but I don't dare take more than one. I don't want to explain that I was late because I was taking pictures of birds. 

I'm disappointed it's blurry, but what can you do when you've got just enough time for one quick photo? 

This sunrise and the birds are like love notes from God. My worries about the day have become a sigh of joy and thanksgiving as I leave the stop sign for the last leg of my drive. 

I am loved, and today I hope I can make everyone else feel that love, too. 

The Little Things Bring Thankfulness

Guys, today's training class was an exam, and it was rough. Scout once again did his best, but I didn't. I didn't give firm enough commands, didn't remember where to start the exercises, and had to give up our original #2 slot because he had to go potty -- he was whiny and wiggly,  the puppy equivalent to the young child potty dance -- but WOULD NOT go. I know he knows more than what he showed the judge tonight, but we bombed the test.

Oh, and I smushed his paw in the door to the building. His scream-cry broke my heart. That was right before the test. Epic Momma Fail.

The thing is that he was still such a happy, loving guy. He laid his head on my hand in the car on the way home then came and snuggled right up with me on the couch. It doesn't matter to him that we bombed it. He doesn't care about the number of points we got (or didn't get.....).

Dogs are awesome because they really don't care about that stuff. You are their human and they adore you. Even when our dogs get squirted with water because they are being too naughty and "no" isn't cutting it...they sulk for a few minutes and are back to being our shadows. Dogs forgive and move on quickly because they know you love them.

I think we could all take it to heart when our dogs think we are awesome.  Sometimes we are more awesome than we can see because we let our mistakes blind us and bring us down.

Tonight I am glad my dogs are more loving and forgiving than I have been to myself. I am thankful for their snuggles and sloppy kisses, and I am thankful for how their very presence is calming and encouraging. They believe in me when I have trouble believing in myself.

Long story short: I love our dogs, and I would be a sadder, grumpier,  lonelier person without them.

The "Top Dog"

Scout has been in a weekly training class since mid-January. We have missed 2 sessions out of the 5 (one due to finding out the night of the first class, one due to illness), but we've learned so much during 3 sessions! He'll be doing the next set of 6 sessions immediately following this set, too, so I'm looking forward to that. 

What a whole new adventure this has been for me! I have been loving every bit of learning about dog training and seeing Scout master big and little skills along the way. I'm no professional, and I certainly know that I am probably making some mistakes along the way, but Scout is a pretty good dog. We still are learning how to channel some of this puppy energy into positive outlets rather than ruined pillows and making holes in blankets, but training is a process that takes patience, time, and repetition. We heard about the trainer from a few people, and they raved about how great she was, and I've loved it. She explains things well, helps where you are having trouble, and has been a huge asset in Scout's training. 

To keep a long story from getting much longer, I am totally having a proud dog-momma moment over here. The class has a traveling trophy each week to the most improved dog from one week to the next. Tonight Scout got to bring it home! It's embarrassing to admit, but I almost cried because it was so uplifting to know that we aren't just biased in seeing his progress. Then again, it's not that hard to get me to cry. (I won't even tell you how many Superbowl commercials this year made me cry. I'll give you a hint: it was at least 3. Especially you, Nationwide.) The lady that ran it tonight said that he really is responding well to commands and that I'm doing a good job with commanding him clearly and firmly. (I was really quiet the first class!) He even worked on doing his work tonight without a treat until the end of his exercises rather than little nibbles throughout. Yup, he's been a hard worker! 

So here it is, Scout's trophy for the week! 

In all fairness I have to say that for all of the times we've gone I have hoped and prayed that he would neither be the "naughty child" nor the "class clown", and he's done pretty well....until tonight. He was so whiny the first half of class, and he was letting out his big ol' obnoxious pterodactyl yawns. The whole class actually laughed at him while I was sitting there going, "Hush, puppy!!" As if the whole world needed to know that the same 7-8 slot of the class is his usual nap time...but I guess I'll take class pterodactyl over the naughty child any day. Ironic that THIS would be the night the trophy comes home, but that's our boy! 

Lessons in Humility and Love

This has been a challenging week for me. For a little while this week frustration stole my joy and clouded my eyes to what blessings were sprinkled into the week. I realized I had to make a choice: I could either keep fuming about the problems that weren't mine to own or I could start recognizing what beautiful and awesome things were going right around me.

seeing the beautiful sunrise over the soft hills and tall grass of the open prairies on my drive to work
listening to music that speaks of the truths that soothe my hurts and disappointments
time in devotions with the friends I work alongside to kick off the day right
hearing the giggles of my kiddos 
celebrating 100 days of school and the kindergarten skills that have been conquered
photographing a day of laughs and love and rollerskating as a school
silly Snaps with my family
sneaking in a dinner date with my husband on a weeknight
snuggling with the puppies while watching my favorite show
reading the Word filled with love and encouragement 
feeling peace and joy trickling back into me until I was full 
being able to humble myself before God and ask for help
knowing His love and grace are endless

A few months ago I went through a spell of feeling like some of the expectations put on me were things I was not capable of doing, and I was really frustrated and dejected as I anticipated failure. I wondered what I had handled the wrong way to get stuck with the task, and I was pretty glum when I sat down to read a devotion. It contained a verse that I immediately wrote down and stuck to my computer so I would see it often.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. 

[Romans 8:28]

I need those words, friends, and I need them when I feel frustrated or incapable. I need them when life isn't going the way I planned...which is every single day.

Sometimes those things that knock us on our butt in life are just a lot of small things that pile up together to pack quite a punch. Sometimes it's one big thing that hurts. I'm comforted in knowing that God never promised life would be easy. He promised never to leave my side, though, and I know that I'm blessed even in the moments it doesn't feel like it. I know I'm walking away from this week with more wisdom than I entered it with, and the stuff that was bothering me has ended up being a blessing. Without that I wouldn't have been humble enough to admit how lousy and lost I am without the hope that I have because of my Savior. I would have missed the little blessings around me that brought joy and peace to my heart as I was reminded that God walks with me.

And now it's Friday night. I face a pile of things to do for school, piles of laundry to fold, dog training to do, and many other items on my to do list this weekend, but it's a welcomed change in pace to be home and working on these things. It's time to be refreshed and renewed for the ups and downs next week will bring. I know I'll mess up, but I know it's all good. If you don't believe me, go back and read Romans 8:28 a few more times until you know it, too.

About The Links...

I've been kind of stuck when it comes to blogging, and it's for a really stupid reason.

I know my family enjoys reading this, and there are some friends that do as well, but I also know that very few people blog themselves and can see when I post something unless I put a link on Facebook. There's nothing wrong with that, but I stopped doing it because I thought it may have looking obnoxious. I didn't want it to be like "LOOK AT ME I CAN WRITE A BLOG CHECK IT OUT I AM AWESOME." I just want the interested people to know I've put something new up. I know there's the option of making those lists where you put certain friends on them and can select who all you want to see what you're posting but let's be real: ain't nobody got time for that.

[Sidenote: If you haven't seen this video, it's one of my favorites. Pretty sure it's one of my husband's favorite answers from me when he asks me to do something.]

But on the other hand, if people don't care about it, they can just skip over it and carry on scrolling down their news feed, right? I just have this thing where I don't like to do things that will bother other people. I think it's called "anxiety" in the medical realm and "ridiculous" among others.

I noticed that less people know I've added anything without those links, though. I think I'll go back to posting links on Facebook again. I know some of you enjoy what I write, and I'm thankful for that. I write because it's fun for me and also stress-relieving. One of the changes I'm working on this year is being okay being me and not letting worries about what other people think keep me from doing what I do. Here's one more step in the right direction.

And you have my permission to let me know if you think that the links are obnoxious.

But seriously, watch that video if you haven't...I promise you'll get a kick out of her. She is even laughing at the end of her interview. I'm pretty sure that lady and I could be friends if we crossed paths.

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

So let's talk hair.

I love, love, love having long hair to play with, but my hair is really thick. Long hair takes FOREVER to dry -- ain't nobody got time for that!!

My last haircut was a trim back in August 2013, a week or so before Dad and Michele's wedding. The ends of my hair crunched. Seriously disgusting.

My first major change of 2015? Getting a major hair cut!!!

Part of the reason it grew out so much to begin with was that I didn't know where to go once we moved here. I have a tough time committing to a new stylist. Flashback to student teaching in the spring of 2011. I went to a salon my co-op suggested, and I had pictures of what I wanted. It required taking off about 4 inches and also layering it. I asked her to do it in a way that would thin out my thick hair to help it dry faster. That Texas humidity was no joke, and my hair would go crazy if I didn't dry it all the way. So we're chatting away and she's snipping away for a while. Things seem to be going well until halfway through the cut she utters the unthinkable: "Oh, I don't know what I'm doing."

Ummm...what?!? 

She asked the other stylist to help her. I had TWO PEOPLE working on my hair -- one on each side -- making jokes about me being the guinea pig. I don't know that it would have been as upsetting if I had liked the haircut, but I absolutely hated it. I know it wasn't totally hideous because people complimented it, but it was not what I wanted. I also had graduation coming up not long afterwards and was grumpy that my hair was going to look stupid.

This crazy mane was getting to the point where I would get tangled in it while I was trying to turn over when I was sleeping. I would randomly inhale it when it was windy out during recess. My favorite was when I would yell "OUCH!" when it got pinned under Tim's arm when we sat on the couch together. It was just...a nuisance. A shapeless, crunchy, time-consuming nuisance.

Before....

I didn't have to cut so much of it off, but I had a strong desire to donate my hair to a place that would make wigs for women battling cancer. I have to admit that it took some pep talking to get myself to commit to cutting it. I was worried I'd be or feel less beautiful with a haircut, but I stopped whining when it hit me that I had the luxury of a choice. I can't imagine the emotions when your hair is falling out completely.Women battling cancer don't get a choice to lose their hair. It's a small thing compared to a cancer battle, but if I can help one woman feel more beautiful during her battle then I can and will definitely do what I can for her.

So here you go, 8 inches shorter, a much lighter head, and a faster morning routine. I feel like I look more my age now, and I am excited to be giving 8 inches to Pantene's Beautiful Lengths for a woman to feel more beautiful.

After! 

If you're interested in donating your hair, please check out the information on this awesome cause here.

New Year, New Adventures

2014 seemed like it couldn't really compete with 2013. See, 2013 brought a lot of exciting and new things: getting married, turning 25, a family vacation to Alaska, moving out of my "bachelorette pad" apartment to a house with my husband in a new city, and a new job. Whew. Don't think we could have crammed much more in if we tried. Needless to say, 2014 did not have a lot of major life events. I was pleasantly surprised to reflect the other night about just how glad I was to look back at what 2014 did hold, though. 2013 was the year of new, but 2014 was the year of growth.

Our house has really become our own thanks to the hard work of my husband and help from my mom and stepdad. We have made plans for a few more projects and are in the beginning phases of those, too, and we're pretty excited for the end products. 

We established our first garden and enjoyed a LOT of fresh, yummy food (again, mostly because of my awesome hubby's dedication. Can you tell he's a talented man?). So many plants that LIVED! It was crazy-awesome. 

We've had a number of visitors and have loved getting to host them whether it was for a meal or a week. We loved every minute.

Tim had his gallbladder out in September, and we were blessed that all went well and to have his mom here to help. He hasn't had a single problem since then, and we are loving the life without gallbladder attacks. 

We've been blessed with a growing friendship with a dear set of neighbors, and we've gotten our foot in the door to become more active and connected at church. We're really establishing this city as our home and becoming more comfortable here, and it's nice to be able to feel settled. God has truly been at work in our life here. 

My job has allowed me the chance to grow beyond what I thought my abilities and interests were, and it hasn't always been easy, but it's been good. I've been blessed to become more confident, able, and assertive. I am so blessed to get to share my God each day and grow in my faith each day, and that makes each day awesome. I adore my kids and coworkers, and that also makes each day awesome.

And of course there's Scout, perhaps one of the greatest adventures of the year. One stop to "just look and pet the puppies"turned into a wild adventure as we have learned about life with a new "baby". He's been a goof, a snugglebug, a playmate, and even a challenging mess sometimes, but he's a good boy. We love our little Wild Thing. 

I know that 2015 is going to bring some big changes, and I'm sitting here at the beginning feeling excited but also nervous. I'm ready for some necessary changes, but I know that there will be some unknowns. But you know what? That just means that this will hold even more adventures than 2014. I know that God is there each step of the way, and I trust in His plan. It's going to be awesome. I know that come December 31st I'll be able to look back and say, "Wow. What a year."

[Spoiler alert: No, this is not my way of announcing any babies. Just life changes. #sorrynotsorry]

So here's to 2015, a year of change and a year of adventure. May all of your adventures be awesomely blessed.